Toby is one

Dear Toby,

Today is your first birthday. Last year, we waited and we wondered if we would ever get to hold you this side of heaven. Even a year ago, as I was preparing for your delivery, I couldn't wrap my mind around the reality of you. But that moment when I got to hold you and look at you.... it was all so worth it.

Your brothers left us so quickly. And our hearts were so shattered- there are pieces of us in heaven. So when we found out you were coming, we were excited and so scared. And so we prayed and we waited. And you.... you are just a little baby. But you have been salve to our hearts. You have been a minister of healing to us.

And now, as we pray and we wait for your sister, you are a reminder of the faithfulness of God.

About you: you aren't walking yet... although you do ocassionally stand up and look around. You crawl like a madman... you tuck your head down and go as fast as you can. You think your name is NoNo. You can say no no, dada, mama, hi, all done, bye, and a lot of things you think are speech. You love to dance to music, especially drums. Any time a drum solo comes on the radio, you stop what you're doing and bob your head.
You and your brother are the best of friends. You don't fight over toys, because Richy gives you whatever you want. You guys like to lay on the floor and wrestle very slowly. He is so gentle with you. And you bite him and pull his hair, and he laughs. We needed you around here.

You like to crawl on Daddy while he's praying. You climb on his back, and crawl under him when he's kneeling and peek at his face. And you like to climb on me and kiss me and kiss me... the more slobber the better.

You are a peaceful boy. You also wreak havoc. We are blessed.

Happy Birthday, my Tobias (believing God is good) Paxton (from the town of Peace).